My name is Ricki, and writing this is incredibly difficult for me.

I have always tried to find a way to make things work, even when there did not seem to be enough money, enough energy, or enough of me to go around. Asking other people for help does not come naturally to me. I am usually the person trying to hold everything together quietly, so admitting that I cannot continue doing it alone makes me feel extremely vulnerable.

I am a disabled mother raising three children, including my six-year-old son, Albie, who has Down syndrome and requires a very high level of supervision and care. He has very little awareness of danger and cannot safely be left unattended. Caring for him is one of the greatest blessings of my life, but it also affects my ability to work outside the home, attend appointments, run basic errands, and earn enough income to support my family.

I am also living with my own medical and mental health challenges, including seizures, depression, ADHD, insomnia, chronic pain, and other conditions that can make even ordinary days difficult. I do my best to keep those struggles away from my children. They deserve to feel protected, loved, and secure—not responsible for the worries their mother carries after they have gone to sleep.

After the end of a long-term relationship, 17 years in fact, I had to rebuild a home, furnish the entire space, and finance everything I possibly could, and begin a new, completely unfollow life for my children with very limited resources. I am grateful that we have a roof over our heads, but every month has become a balancing act. My income is fixed, and after rent, utilities, food, transportation, household necessities, medications, clothing, school needs, and expenses for the children, there is simply not enough left.

For several months, I have survived by borrowing money through small cash-advance services and loans. I borrow to make it through the month, then repay the money from the following month’s income—only to immediately fall short and borrow it again. It is a cycle that leaves me beginning each month already behind.

I am not asking for luxury. I am asking for the opportunity to reach zero instead of continuously beginning below it.

My fundraising goal is $2,500. The first portion would help me repay the money I have been relying on to cover essential expenses and finally interrupt this exhausting cycle of borrowing. The remainder would provide a modest cushion for emergencies and upcoming needs for my children, including birthdays, Christmas, seasonal clothing, school expenses, and the unexpected costs that inevitably arise in a family.

I know that saving for birthdays or Christmas may not sound like an emergency. To a mother who has spent every holiday wondering what bill can be postponed so her children can still have something to open, however, even a small amount set aside represents peace. It means being able to prepare instead of panic. It means that one unexpected expense would not unravel the entire month.

There are nights when I lie awake doing the same calculations over and over, trying to find money that simply is not there. I worry about failing my children even though I am giving them everything I have. I worry that another broken appliance, medical need, transportation problem, or school expense will be the thing I cannot solve.

My faith has carried me through some of the darkest and most uncertain seasons of my life. I believe God often answers prayers through the kindness of other people, although it is humbling to accept that I may need to be the person receiving that kindness right now.

Any contribution, no matter the amount, would help my family move toward stability. If you cannot donate, sharing this fundraiser or praying for my children and me would mean more than I can express.

I am not asking anyone to rescue me from my responsibilities. I am asking for a hand while I regain my footing.

Thank you for taking the time to read our story, for seeing the person behind this request, and for helping me believe that a more stable chapter may still be possible for my family. We were especially hit hard, because I was completely unaware that our relationship was even at risk, and I have not once in my whole life been the head of any household before. I have been disabled for 12 years.

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