Today, I finally found the courage to ask—truly to plead with your kindness and generosity—for help in making my dream of owning a home come true. I am 58 years old and have worked as a self-employed Desktop Specialist for nearly 30 years. I love what I do and am usually very busy. Most days, I get out of bed, turn on my computer, work until evening, then go straight back to bed. You might think I should be able to afford a home, and I once could. But a few years ago, much of my work began to be outsourced overseas. To compete, I had to cut my hourly rate in half—below minimum wage. Since then, I have worked days, nights, weekends, and holidays just to cover rent and food. Now I am barely getting by. I do not take vacations, and I never turn down work, even jobs that pay only seven or eight dollars. Somehow, I have ended up working more while earning less.

Ever since I was a child, I have felt that one lifetime is not enough for all the things I want to do. I play three musical instruments, and I have always dreamed of having the time to play for hours just for the joy of it. I also love painting, and my college professors often told me I had a special eye for art. I already have the supplies, waiting for the day I can finally use them to turn what I see in nature into paintings. My grandfather made beautiful furniture by hand in the traditional way, and watching him work inspired me to dream of making furniture like his one day. My mother also made beautiful dresses and outfits for me when I was young, and everyone admired her skill. I have always hoped that one day I would have the time to sew my own clothes too.

I grew up in my grandparents’ house, where they had a beautiful garden. When I was little, I was always the first one awake in the morning, and I loved going into the garden to look for the tiniest flowers hidden beneath the grass blades. I thought they were every bit as beautiful as the larger flowers. Even now, I still look for them whenever I walk in nature. I have always dreamed of painting them one day so others can see how beautiful they are.

Then it hit me: I will be 59 this year, and I cannot keep putting this off. I found a realtor and started the loan application process. I also found a fixer-upper within my budget. I do not mind that it needs work—I am willing to repair it by myself little by little.

Since deciding to buy this little house, I have felt more worried than excited. Handling everything on my own has been stressful and overwhelming, especially because the house is in poor condition and needs many inspections, which have added to my expenses. I keep asking myself whether I should give up or keep going. In the end, I decided to reach out and ask for help.

I feel so bad asking for help. Despite the many things I want to do—enough to fill several lifetimes—I know I have only one. Some people believe in reincarnation, but if that is true, I do not want to come back again :D. I am an ordinary woman, and in this lifetime I simply want to be honest, loyal, kind, and decent, while doing the things I have always dreamed of. I hope this hasn’t been too tedious to read. Please contact me if you have any questions.

I will keep you updated on my progress as I pursue my dreams.

From the bottom of my heart, I appreciate your help so much!