Please help us help Payne

Goal:

 USD $3,000

Raised:

 USD $305

Campaign created by Payne & The VanHorn Family

Campaign funds will be received by Dana VanHorn

Please help us help Payne

This is our loving and the best obedient boy, Payne. He is a German Shephard/Norwegian Elkhound mix. We just found out about a month ago that he has cancer. We decided that at his age of 13 1/2 we would not put him through any surgery's, nor would we do chemo or radiation, but just let him live his best, most comfortable and pain-free life for as long as possible. Other than arthritis in his back hips and legs he still does get around very well. He is a very happy dog and still loves to play, eats, drinks, help, everything like a normal dog, just getting older.... And people and animals do live with arthritis. We believe it wouldn't be right to put him down now, when he still so active and playful for a 13 yr dog. But the decision of just letting "it" go soon changed after 3 different dr. opinions, a biopsy, x-rays and bloodwork. It was determined that if the cancerous cyst on his leg/foot is not removed as soon as possible, he will bleed to death and die soon. BUT there is a risk at his age to be put under anesthesia, go through surgery and then do follow up care on an opened wound, possibly for the rest of his life (cyst is right at the bottom of the leg/foot area which there is not enough skin in that area to close the wound and it will need 24/7 wound care because of ligaments, tendons and everything being exposed) This probably will not remove all the cancer, but do we just let him bleed to death or put him down now when he is still so "healthy" and good! These are very hard decisions. We already have over $2000 in these test to even determine if it's cancer and how his heart and blood work is and now just found out the surgery will probably be another $3000 then follow up and wound care on top of that. NO, we do not have that kind of money. We will have to max out a credit card, but do we just him! This will hurt us financially, but what other choice do we have???? We are not ready to say goodbye to him yet, and we believe he is not ready to go yet either. He's in good health, other than this cancer and cyst! And he loves people and loves life.

If you don't know our boy, we're sure you would just say "put him down", but those of you who know him and how he is still getting around fairy well, would totally understand our very difficult predicament and decision. We decided to get the cyst removed surgically so it does not continue to open and bleed, and then after that we will just take it a day at a time. Dr said the surgery should be as soon as possible, so it is now planned for this next wed, 12/20.

We were in no way, going to ask for any help, but many of our friends have said that we are not being greedy or selfish if we do go ahead and create this account. So if you feel led to help in any way, We, and most definitely, Payne, would surely appreciate it. We know he's not physically ready to die yet and we certainly are not ready to "" him off, so this is what we feel we must do for him now. Please do not give if you do not feel you should. This was just created for those who wanted to help our boy and this difficult, financial situation that we are now dealing with. Thank you for caring!

Recent Donations
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Eva Eckenrode
$ 30.00 USD
3 months ago

Kate L
$ 50.00 USD
7 months ago

Prayers for the healing of this precious fur baby. Also for his family!

Anonymous
$ 20.00 USD
10 months ago

Get well soon Payne!

Eva Eckenrode
$ 30.00 USD
10 months ago

Anonymous Giver
$ 40.00 USD
10 months ago

Ashley Kline Vargas
$ 100.00 USD
10 months ago

Praying for Payne.

Hilary - Prayers for Payne
$ 10.00 USD
11 months ago

Anonymous Giver
$ 25.00 USD
11 months ago

Much love to you Payne! And to you to Dana!

Updates

Update #17

December 4th, 2024

December 3, 2024

3 months since our last update. And for sure, every single day we still have with our boy is so very precious!  I love when we can see and prove how our God is more knowing than any doctor out there!  October 2023-Biopsy diagnosis High grade 3 soft tissue sarcoma. December 2023-Surgery to remove mass tumor.  Could not get clear margins because of tumor location without amputation of leg, Oncologist suggested chemo and radiation. We declined amputation, chemo and radiation because of his 14 yr. age.  Dr. said without treatments, Payne would probably only last 3-6 months at most, and tumor would return more aggressive than before. Here we are 12 months later! Our boy has definitely slowed down, and yes, the tumor started growing again 2 months post surgery. Instead of the tumor being one "lump" as before surgery, it continues to grow, but is 4 different "lumps" all located in the same area on his hind foot/leg. (As of 3 months ago, the cancer had not traveled to any other parts of his body or organs)  As the mass has grown, it gets so big and the skin so tight, that it must bother him enough, that he licks it and bites at it, until it breaks open and bleeds. This has happened 2 times since April, and with it being so open and raw, we have to treat it with antibiotic creams, and wrap it loosely for days until the bleeding stops. This last time, 3 weeks ago, I was concerned about how much blood he lost. I was really worried, but he seemed to bounce back days later, after it stopped bleeding.  The large size tumor reduces in size because of "breaking open", but then grows back again. And Yes, it is becoming more aggressive as time goes on. We are continuing with the light therapy, and giving him supplements for the arthritis. We notice him struggling more with his hips and joints in his legs and laying down and getting back up. The pain meds are helping with that, but we are just praying they are not affecting his liver and kidneys like the meloxicam did. The most recent blood work showed his kidney and liver functions were better than they had been on the meloxicam.  But through it all, he still is a champ! He still eats and drinks like normal, gets up and trots around outside, more than just walking, but not as fast as running. He still gets excited to go away, to go outside with dad, but I do see some signs of sadness and depression more so, which hurts me to the core! We just take it a day at a time. We do not know what the next week, or months hold, but we appreciate each and every day he gets up, still moves and goes outside to get even a little exercise. Please continue praying, my friends, as we believe that is how he is still with us and doing as well as he is.


I would love to show you a video that I took of him last week, as I was excited how well he was "trotting" around, but can not load videos on this page, so please check it out on my facebook wall.

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Update #16

August 31st, 2024

Well. our boy is still kickin!!!  And still "jogging" around.  I say that because he doesn't run as fast as he used too, but he still moves faster than just walking when he is helping Craig or going after something he sees. I get a little sad though when I see him watch a bird, a bunny or a groundhog, instead of running after it like he used to. I think he knows they'll outrun him now, so why bother.  But we are ecstatic he is still doing so well!!  He had his regular annual visit 2 weeks ago, got his regular updated shots, and Dr. said he seems great for an old man!  They examined his open and growing tumor, and said that since we aren't putting him through chemo or radiation, we need to just continue keeping it as clean as possible and soak it in epsom salts, if needed, which we do, BUT ....It was time for his blood work again, and sadly it revealed that his kidney functions were elevated this time. This was the first time his kidney's or liver showed any concern or problems. The Dr. thinks it may be from the Meloxicam meds for pain and inflammation that we are giving him for his arthritis, so we were supposed to stop it and see if the kidney functions return to normal. So we stopped giving it to him, and we are now noticing him limping more from his back hips and legs, and having trouble getting up once he is laying down. We have to actually help him up now when he is laying for a longer period of time! This makes me so sad. I know the Meloxicam was really helping him!  I feel like we are deliberately hurting him and watching him be in pain!!  I hate this!  We are not sure if the elevated kidney functions are from the Meds. or from the cancer but this is what they wanted to rule out first.  So we are giving him gabapentin for arthritic pain, but nothing for the inflammation. and now the tumor also seems to be growing bigger and faster now too.  We just wait now till we can get the blood work again and see what it shows..... Sometimes he seems sad, especially when he  struggles getting up, but overall He is in good spirits most of the time, and still get excited to go and do things!  Please keep the prayers coming. I know that is why he is still doing as well, considering what he's been through. Yes, he has been through a lot this year! It will be a year this Sept. that we first got his cancer diagnosis. So many questions, decisions, meds, appts. surgery, tests, natural supplements, and many thousands of dollars, but we would definitely do it again, for his sake, as well as ours!  If you would still love to help him in his journey with your prayers and/or financial support, know that we do really love and appreciate it.  The love, support, and encouraging words that we have gotten for him this past year has surely meant the world to us!  We couldn't have gotten through this without all of you!

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Update #15

July 27th, 2024

2 weeks since my last update, but the cancer tumor has grown drastically since then! 

 Please keep my boy (and us) in your prayers. His tumor on his foot/leg area is growing at a very fast pace. We have been continually treating it, but now it has broken open, and is "ugly and messy" and growing at an alarming rate, even bigger now than what it was in Dec. when it was surgically removed. The oncologist said that the (C) will probably get "mean" after surgery, and they were right! I don't know how big it can grow before he will not be able to walk. So far he is able to walk, and get up and down, but this unknowing of what the (C) will do and when, is the worst! Thankfully, the (C) has not spread to any organs, (as of March), he is not sick, and he is still eating and drinking well, and still enjoying life. He has been through so much and is taking it all like a champ, but I know it has not been fun or easy for him! (or us) More tests and visits the next 2 weeks to determine how to continue treating the open, raw tumor and giving him the best quality of life possible! I LOVE my boy!

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Update #14

July 15th, 2024

WOW, I just noticed it has been since May since I left an update! We are so blessed to still have Payne with us. We never thought, back in November and December last year, or even in Feb. or March of this year, that he would still be with us this long, so both Craig and I are rejoicing every single day that we get to enjoy and love him longer, and that he is still enjoying life, as well!  (And some had told us in Dec. that we should put him down, instead of doing what we could to extend his quality of life. So glad we did not listen to them!)

On the outside, physically, just looking at him, you would never know that anything is wrong or that he has a fatal and terminal illness - that nasty C word! He turned 14 in January, but he sure does not look like, or even act like a 98 year old (people years). He definitely does lay around a lot more, than he used too, just watches the rabbits running by, instead of chasing after them, gets tired much quicker, and doesn't play as rough or as long as he used to, but that's understandable for his age. He trots, instead of runs, but he still loves to go outside, takes his walks through the fields, help dad get wood, and still gets excited when he sees us, and wants to play, until he realizes he's getting tired sooner than he wants too and can't quite do as much.  

We are still giving him meloxicam for his joint pain and discomfort for arthritis in his back hips and legs which definitely helps him a lot get around!  He also gets glucosamine and chondroitin, a mushroom supplement, and vitamins and minerals for older dogs, as well as his daily 30-40 minutes of iTeraCare Terahertz Frequency therapy, all of which we believe have definitely helped him live longer and given him a much better quality of life in the last 6-9 months!

BUT another tumor has developed very close to the same area as where the other one was surgically removed. Since that cancer tumor surgery in December, we knew that all the cancer could not be removed because of it's location. They could not get clear margins, unless they would have removed his whole leg up to his hip. This tumor is growing at a fast pace, as did the other one, and we were told to have it removed again would cause the cancer to be more aggressive, which is what we are seeing with this tumor. We did not remove the whole leg in December, because we were also informed that at his age, it might possibly be more drastic for him to adjust to only having 1 hind leg, and since he already has arthritis in his back hips, it would have been much harder on him to get around. Thus causing him to have less of a quality of life, not being mobile, than just allowing him to have the best possible quality of life for as long as possible.   

SO HERE WE ARE! The tumor is growing! He is still mobile, as I mentioned above, doing exceptionally well, but this new tumor is soon ready to break open. Like before, it will be a raw, nasty mess that we will have to keep bandaged, and keep him from licking or messing with it.  Not sure what will happen next, if it will continue to grow, once it breaks open, or remain the same.

We had thought about when this happens again, that we would NOT amputate the leg, but as good as he still is getting around, it might be a possibility.  Our next step is seeing the doctor again soon to get new blood work to see if the cancer has remained localized! As long as it has not spread to any other part of his body, removing the leg would keep him with us longer. but what kind of quality of life would he have with only 1 back leg, and arthritis in the hips, at this age? That's our dilemma AGAIN!  We are praying the cancer has not moved! 

This as been so hard! He has ALWAYS BEEN THE BEST DOG EVER! and we know he is not ready to leave us yet. This cancer diagnosis and tumor has really been him and us, but he is still doing very well, considering, for a 14 year old!   Please continue praying for him (and us). We know that is the only reason he is doing so well, getting around physically and feeling as good as he is! 

All your prayers are so greatly appreciated!  If you feel led to help us with the financial end of all his visits, medications, blood work, x-rays, other tests, and still paying on his surgery, recovery, and boarding from December, that also will be appreciated more than you'll ever know.  Thank you so much for your love and care for our beloved Payne!

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Update #13

May 9th, 2024

After the last few days of weighing pros and cons and options with the dr's, we all have determined that Payne's quality of life is still very good, even considering his age of 14. He is still moving well with his hind leg that has the cancerous tumor on, and doesn't seem to be in any pain. A sarcoma tumor normally does not cause or trigger pain, so that is a plus! And as of January, the cancer has not spread and is localized to that one area, but it continues to grow.

OPTION 1 - If left go, as stated before, it will definitely get much bigger and more "nasty" that he will not be able to walk on that foot, and become infected and/or spread to other parts or even organs. That would be just watching him get physically worse and worse, until we decide to have him euthanized, when that quality of life deteriorates.

OPTION 2- Put him through another surgery and just remove the tumor again. That will not remove the cancer, because of where it is located they can not get clear margins. It would just grow back again and we'll be right here again in 4 months.

OPTION 3 - Taking a risk, because he is 14, of putting him through another surgery and amputate the leg to remove all the cancer. Then the unknown is how well will he adapt, at 14 with only 1 back leg. He does have a significant amount of arthritis in his back hips and joints, (doing extremely well on meloxicam, as you can see) but with only 1 back leg, would that cause more arthritic problems or pain on his back hips? Would he get depressed and just give up? Do we take the risk?

OPTION 4 - Do a little of both options. Continue to control the bleeding of the tumor, trying our best 100% of the time to keep him from biting at it, until it gets to where we see it might be affecting his walking or becoming uncomfortable for him, then follow through with the amputation, and maybe a prosthesis. The "afterwards" is unknown, but we would be getting rid of the cancer! (thousands of $$$, and another loan, but I'll give up another vacation for the life of my boy)

No matter what we choose there is a risk to all options! But again, the dr's have confirmed that he definitely is not ready to "go" yet and his quality of life is still great! He beat the odds in December when he went through the first surgery and the Dr's were amazed! So even though we said we were not going to do anymore..., we are now leaning toward option 4. But this is still so hard! Why can't they live so much longer! 14 years is just so short!

I hope I'm not sounding selfish, but some have offered to financially help our boy live a longer and continued happy life. That would be very much appreciated!!!

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Update #12

May 6th, 2024

Well, here we are! The C tumor has grown and the skin so tight that it opened and it is now a huge, raw, bleeding mess!!!  I will spare you the gross pictures!  We can NOT keep it wrapped, as any bandages, even loose ones, have caused more swelling to and around the wound site and leg. I do put a sock on it, but that keeps coming off. He is bothered by it, limping some and if we don't keep a constant eye on him, he will bite at it and make it even more raw and a nasty mess! (which has happened when he sees I'm not looking at him) I also have put neem oil and/or manuka honey and liquid bandage on it, but it still IS a cancerous, growing tumor so NOTHING will help it get better or heal!!! 

We are at a huge loss what to do next! And at a critical point again right now!  I called both his vet and the vet oncologist and asked what to do next and how to keep him the best and as comfortable as we can. Being a weekend, the emergency dr's will have them call us today/Monday.  STILL.. other than his leg and the wound, he is feeling good, eating, walking around, wanting to go out, etc...it's just this C tumor that is nasty and mean and causing discomfort right now!   I even asked (and now, we might be considering) how much it would cost if we decided to amputate the leg to get rid of the cancer. 

Please, Please, Please pray for him and us!  What is the best to do for him?  We said we were not going to do anything else, but he is still feeling physically good for his age... how can I just watch him deteriorate from this tumor bleeding and raw and getting infected in the next days and then IT make him sick and die OR how can we take him and give him that deadly shot when he's still feeling good, and talking and playing with us. He looks at me with those brown eyes and says, I know you love me, you can't just let me die!   Ohhhh, this is so hard!  He's our baby!  One minute at a time...

He's so worth every penny, but yes, these vet payments are getting so ridiculous! (I even gave up a cruise to help pay for him). But how can we ever say that these vet bills or any amount of money is more important than his life! WE can NOT! We are more attached to this boy than any pet we have ever had! He IS NOT JUST a dog!

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Update #11

April 30th, 2024

Update on my boy.  since our last update, we got the bleeding under control, but.....

Look at him. Doesn't he look so good, and so happy!!! 

It's been 4 1/2 months since we agonized over whether we do or do not operate to remove a malignant tumor, because of his age (he turned 14 in January) and knowing a risky surgery would not remove all the cancer.

4 months ago he went through the surgery, and since his recovery, he's been doing great, he's happy, and he's been such a joy, and by our side now more than ever. 🥰

BUT ..... about a month after the surgery we noticed another tumor had started to grow again in the same location. The oncologist had informed us to be prepared for that since they could not get clear margins with the surgery, other than by amputating the whole leg. The biopsy had shown that it is High Grade 3 type, but at that point the cancer had not spread to any other part of his body. Since we decided not to amputate the leg, we were told that it definitely would come back, but there was no way of knowing how soon it would rear its ugly head again. Or, being a High grade 3, when it would travel to any other parts or organs in his body.

Now here we are again, he's feeling great, enjoying life, and we are very happy we made the decision to go through with the surgery, BUT the tumor has grown to the point where it was in December where it is going to break open any time now...... The oncologist told us that putting him through another surgery is very risky (again) plus the more surgery's the more aggressive and mean the cancer will get, so we are not going to put him through that. BUT as good as he is feeling, how can we just give him a death sentence and watch this tumor bleed, get gross, and without doing anything more, become infected and him! ...but we know this is coming. 😥 (He is taking a supplement for benign lumps to slow down the growth, another supplement for joint and heart health, a med. for arthritis, using some oils and iteracare frequency therapy (who knows if they are really doing anything), but sadly nothing will take this nasty C away!

So, this is where we are now. Taking it a day, and hours, at a time! Loving him! Enjoying him! I JUST CAN'T LOOSE HIM! He is my company, my BEST friend, my companion! My heart is breaking! How can we give him a shot, (when the time comes) knowing that he still feels and acts good, other than this stupid tumor that is a HUGE problem! I feel like that would be us, a person knowing and feeling good, only to have one little bump, that's not even painfully hurting us, but the dr. says , "sorry, we have to give you this shot, so that you will die". I JUST CANT DO IT! I look at this tumor every day, seeing it get bigger and bigger, and stretching the skin so much that it is purple and black now, ready to open, and I fear when the time comes...then what. I can't do it! This is NOT FUN!

Someone asked me, will you get another dog? NO WAY! I can NOT go through this again. NO! This is too painful! And absolutely NO dog would or could ever be as good as him! Never did one bad thing in his life, and so obedient and loving!

And yes, it has been very expensive! More $$$ than I ever thought I would ever put into a "dog", but he is NOT just a "dog" to us, so yes, it has been worth it all! If you would love to help us with all his medical bills, appts, tests, medications, etc., it is most definitely and greatly appreciated.

Thank you all so much for caring about our boy!!

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Update #10

March 6th, 2024

A sad day here Wed. March 6, 2024   Only 11 weeks since his surgery....

My boys cancer tumor has come back. And it has doubled in size, and just today has broken open and bleeding. Here we are again. We can't put him through another surgery! And we can't afford chemo! 😓The more the tumor/cyst is removed, or messed with, the more aggressive they say the C will become! Other than that stupid tumor, which now is causing him some discomfort, because he starting limping today, he is still feeling great. He still wants to go out with Craig, still wants to play.....why did it need to come back SO SOON! My heart is breaking for him! He is not ready to go yet. Someone said we will know. It's not that time yet, but we don't know how to take care of this nasty tumor. Can't keep it wrapped, that makes it worse! Can't keep it unwrapped, then he bites at it. ughhhhh!!!! 😭😢 I fear this is near the end, not because he is feeling bad, HE IS NOT, but this tumor will do him in! Dr. has been called and appt. first thing next week. Just got to get through this week first!

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Update #9

February 22nd, 2024

I have had 2 really good months since my surgery on December 20. Feelin great! 🐕‍🦺

For those of you who do not know. I was diagnosed with an aggressive High Grade “C” last September. I had not been sick at all, just a C tumor that grew incredibly fast from August through December, then it broke open, got really gross and nasty, and had I not had surgery to remove it I would have bled to death or died from the infection of the open growing tumor. Mom and dad, and dr’s did a “quality of life” assessment and found that I was still in good shape, and wanted to live, and feeling good, so there was no choice! Surgery was very risky at my age, but being in good health, my mom and dad could not just let me die that way OR "get rid of me"!! No Way!  SCARY for me and my mom and dad, but the choice and decision was clear! $4500 later, I came through surgery remarkably well, and We all shared a great Christmas together. And I even walked that same day, which was a miracle! And we celebrated my 14th birthday on January 21. I’ve been feeling great! ❤️

Now the bad, sad news! Going into this, we knew that where the tumor was located that removing it would not get all the bad cells, unless they would have removed my whole leg. Dr. said that was not even a possibility, again with my age and arthritis in my hips and joints. Dr. said the C tumor probably will grow back again very fast and surgery after surgery would be required to continue removing it. As well as Chemo and/or radiation to slow it down. “Expect regrowth if chemo is not performed.” Not only would it not be good for me to go through more surgeries, but that would also just make the "C" mad and wreak havoc much, much worse on my body! Not a good prognosis! 😭 My other dr. who did the surgery said we better start chemo now or it would have been a waste to do the surgery if we were not going to follow up with the treatments. The oncologist called with a MONTHLY chemo estimate of $625.25 and asked when we were ready to start. My mom groaned! How could they afford this monthly for me? But how could they not! They love me! Oncologist said not to wait until it gets really bad again, and opens like it did in Dec. before we start with treatments! …. But we waited. Let’s see what happens. Maybe IT will not grow so fast. Maybe IT won’t come back at all. Maybe they are wrong!

My mom and dad started supplement for both my arthritis discomfort, and other preventative measures for “bad cells”, trying to do what they can in a more natural way.

BUT WE ARE VERY, VERY, VERY SAD TO REPORT that although I am feeling great, playing, running, eating, etc., the healed over site where the tumor was removed has started to grow again. And it has only been 2 short months! 🥺 Mom and dad will never question their decisions to spend that crazy amount of money on me to give me more time! They say I am definitely worth millions!! BUT this C is growing faster than they thought, so here we are again. Mom and dad can not afford that monthly chemo bill, so they are questioning what to do….If we don’t do treatments, we just let it grow until it breaks open again, which will be within the month or two, at the latest, as seen from the speed of it before, it bleeds, we keep it bandaged, it grows so big, that IT will me! Mom feels like she is giving me the death sentence! WE hate this! I don’t know how much longer I will be around. BUT I feel so good. I am playing, running and enjoying life. How can I die like this? This quick? We are sad! Mom can not live without me. I can not die! Why did this happen to me?

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Update #8

January 27th, 2024

We have checked into many of the organizations that "help" with financial assistance of veterinary medical care, but sadly, most of these, if not all, do not cover already paid bills that have included Payne's surgery, medications, Dr visits, testings, xrays, bloodwork, routine follow up, bandage supplies, etc., that were necessary, urgent and needed done in a timely manner, since his cancer diagnosis. Both the animal hospital and the regular vet clinic require immediate payment upfront and do not accept payment plans, thus requiring us to pay at time of service with a credit card. We even have tried to do as much as we can at the regular vet clinic, as opposed to the hospital, since the hospital is almost 3 times the cost with everything! But now, the clinic has released all his care to the hospital, and everything now has to be handled through the oncologist at the animal hospital.   We have almost $4000 in this last month, but we believe any amount was definitely worth sparing his life for! He's our baby! These organizations require clear diagnosis, treatment plan, and an estimate of the cost of care from a veterinarian and/or oncologist BEFORE treatment expenses incur and may then only cover a percentage of balances due, which would then be sent directly to dr. and/or hospital BEFORE procedure, treatment, etc. is done. Only if we continue with chemo treatment plan, an estimate of $500 per month, would they be able to maybe help with a small percentage, and we still are unsure if we want to put Payne through that. He is feeling and doing so good right now, and we do not want him sick, but we are so very saddened to know that this will not continue, if we do nothing! If only money was not an option!!! We know there is no way that this would even be financially feasible! This is so hard!!!!!

The bloodwork that he had done 2 days ago did show his liver markers were slightly elevated since his last blood work in December because of being on Meloxicam for his arthritis, so please pray that this does not continue as he does benefit from and need this medication.

Thank you so much for the prayers, love and support for our best loved and obedient boy!

Our boy has been through so much this last month, but he's taking it like a champ!

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Update #7

January 26th, 2024

HAPPY! DISCOURAGED! SAD! FRUSTRATED!

So Super HAPPY that our boy is feeling Great! Running, Playing, Open incision is healing nicely, medicine for arthritis in his back hips is working wonders, Birthday boy turned 14 (1/20/24), acting like 5! So very HAPPY!

DISCOURAGED AND SAD that the cancer could not all be removed and Dr., Oncologist and Pathologist all confirm that it will most likely return in the form of another tumor as aggressively as the past one did. They grow, they open, if not surgically removed, he bleeds to death or infection kills him first. The more surgeries, the livelihood the more aggressive the cancer becomes. No win situation! Just a matter of time! This can not be! ... Unless we start treatment plan ASAP. BUT HE FEEL SO GOOD! ACTING LIKE A 3-5 yr old.

FRUSTRATED that in order to get more medicine, more blood work is required. He just had blood work in Dec. They need to make sure this med. isnt affecting his liver and kidneys. Understandably, just frustrated that we weren't told about all these little "extra" things. Here's to another $150. on top of the med. cost and everything else! thousands later.....

I know, I know, some would say they never would spend that kind of money on their pet. I thought that too, until this! He's not just a pet, he's our child, our baby. Shows unconditional, obedient love always!

Just spoke with oncologist again yesterday who says we should start a treatment plan with chemo and monthly testing, etc. ASAP, so, of course, I'm still waiting for an estimate on cost for us to determine this next step. He said an estimate would likely be about $500 a month. WHAT! SHOCKED! We can't afford that! So now, ...I just tell my boy, sorry, I can't afford you, so I'm going to you!!??!

My boy is worth a million bucks to us, and If we had the money, we definitely would not think twice about putting it towards his life, but we don't.

WHAT? HE IS FEELING AND DOING SO WELL, so ... we do nothing and Just choose to let him die! Take him in and him? Because we can't afford him? So cruel! Do we just people too, if we can't afford them?

We have already maxed out 1 credit card. It's just so frustrating to know I can't afford that kind of money! SO FRUSTRATING to look into his beautiful eyes and tell him, I can't afford to help you, I have to watch you die! How inhumane is this!!!

We're at such a loss!

BUT HE'S PLAYING AND FEELING SO GOOD!

Oncologist says as healthy as he is, other than this stupid "c" thing, he likely would live another 2-6 yrs.

Praying for some answers to help my boy live a much longer life.

 GOD, GIVE MY BOY HIS LIFE THAT HE DESERVES!

A HUGE THANK YOU TO THOSE WHO HAVE HELPED! PAYNE, AND WE, SURE DO APPRECIATE IT!

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Update #6

January 17th, 2024

Well, it's been 27 days since my surgery. I had another visit with my Dr. yesterday. I really don't like going there. I was ready to leave even before I walked in the door. I mean, who likes their Dr. anyways?!? 🤔 The plan was for me to get another Phovia treatment to aid in the healing of the wide open incision area where the cancerous tumor was removed, but could not be closed. After she removed my bandages, she said the site looked great and I did not need the phovia treatment. I was so happy! I must admit, I did bite off the bandages a few times over the last 27 days, when no one was looking, I know bad! bad! but overall, I listened pretty good and this proves it! Hurrah! It's healing good and the open site is getting smaller. And I'm feeling really great for an almost 14 yr old. I'm even going up and down whole flights of steps again! and playing in the snow! Ya know, my birthday is in 3 days!

But....If only it was that simple and this whole "C" journey would be over once it heals completely. But, sadly that's not the case! My oncologist says that I do need to start chemo, since the cancer cells could not all be removed. or the tumor will be back. I do not want that! Will I get sick. Why can't this just go away! I want to live longer and feel as good as I do now! My mom bought a iTeracare TeraHertz Wand (supposed to rejuvinate cells and cancer cells and do many other amazing things for the body)and has been using that daily on me (and on her and dad too) and is also trying some natural essential oils too, as per oncologist, but still recommending chemo to start asap. We see him again next week. I appreciate all your prayers. I know they are making me feel so much better! Just need to stay that way now! 

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Update #5

January 6th, 2024

*Payne's Journey - Friday, 1/5/24

I saw my Dr. again this week, and she gave me a phovia light therapy treatment to aide in the healing of my open wound where they removed the tumor. They want it healed and closed as quickly as possible. This cancer is a high grade lll and is aggressive and they suggested we start chemo soon to prevent the mass from recurring probably as quickly as within a month. I do not want that. I do not want to get sick. I am having fun again, running, playing and helping my mom and dad with the chores! I feel good and am enjoying life again. Why did I have to get cancer!!!! I'm not ready to die! My mom and dad are not ready for me to die either! They are struggling with what to do cause chemo is so expensive, but if left go, the tumor will come back and it'll open, like before and I'll just bleed to death. Who wants that kind of fate!

Please remember friends, my Dr and Oncologist said that I am in great physical shape and probably could live another 2-5 years. If it wasn't for this stinking C word. My mom has looked into other pet cancer financial support, and we are waiting to hear if we qualify. But that could take months to see if were accepted, and I need care now. They do not help with previous appts. or bills. If you find it in your heart to help me, we would appreciate any support you could give. It is getting very expensive with each appt. and I need another 1 or 2 phovia treatments first before the chemo and/or radiation or any natural therapy can begin. I'm hoping to survive this and be around for another 2-5 years. Hopefully!!!!!

Thankfully, I feel so good and happy right now!

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Update #4

January 2nd, 2024

*Payne's Journey - HAPPY NEW YEAR Monday, 1/1/24

It is a week and a half since my surgery. Overall, I am feeling pretty good, and I had a great Christmas with mom, dad, brother, and the little grandson. I don't need my pain meds. anymore and am playing and having fun again. I don't really enjoy the daily dressing changes or the boot that I have to wear, but I don't give mom any trouble with them.

My mom got my biopsy results back from the tumor that was removed. Sadly, it did confirm 100% that it is cancer. The good news is that it looks like a type of cancer that might not travel to any on my major organs. But the biopsy did show that the cancer did extend past the margins of the mass which means that removing the mass did not remove all the cancer cells. The Dr. said that my mom and dad have 3 choices. I will either need to start chemotherapy in order for the mass and/or other tumors not to return as aggressively as this one did, OR they can research some holistic natural ways that might slow down the progression of the cancer OR do nothing.....but that means we go through the same thing that we have gone through in the last 4 months. It is highly likely that the tumor will start to grow again quickly and then we're right back to where we were before the surgery. I Love life and am feeling pretty good again, and I surely don't want to go through all that again! I see the vet oncologist this next week to check and continue treatment of the open wound care and discuss this further. My mom and dad are so happy that I am doing so well right now, but so sad that the surgery did not take away all the bad cells in my body! ......one day at a time.

Yes, this is getting more and more expensive, but isn't my life worth it? I am not ready to give up or be put down, as I am still really enjoying everything that life, mom and dad have to offer me! If money was not an option, I think mom and dad would consider chemo, if it would not make me sick! But each treatment is very expensive and they are not able to afford that. And after looking into some natural options, that is also very expensive. So, the choices and decisions are getting very difficult!

If you would love to help me, I, mom and dad, would really appreciate your love, kindness and thoughtfulness in helping me live a longer and enjoyable life. Mom and dad's friends have asked us to set up this fundraiser if you would love to help.

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Update #3

January 2nd, 2024

Monday, 12/25/23 We just received the BEST Christmas present this year!

Every Christmas, Payne gets a present, a Big treat that he loves! He'd always get so excited when he'd see it; a red ribboned beef flavored rawhide bone. He'd grab it in his mouth and throw it around in the air and then want you to try to take it from him so he could grab it and try to pull it back. Our way of playing together with the bone. And then he'd spend hours, every day chewing on it till it was gone. I gave him his present 2 weeks ago, and he never touched it. Not even as much as smelled it. I gave him other treat bones too, in the last 2 weeks, and nothing!

Since the surgery last Wed. he had been pretty lethargic, not eating or drinking much, and being on pain meds. I think his stomach has been upset. He had even thrown up some and has had diarrhea, which is definitely not a good sign. BUT TODAY...

HE PLAYED!!! He wanted me to play with him and his present and he even chewed on it for a long time! He acted like his normal pre-cancer self! Hallelujah! Tears of joy as we PLAYED TOGETHER! Keep the prayers coming! They're working!!!!

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Update #2

January 2nd, 2024

Thursday 12/21/23 A HUGE, HEARTFELT THANK YOU for all your prayers yesterday! I came through the surgery remarkably well, just a little slower coming out of anesthesia than they thought and pretty loopy all night long. Mom said I looked like a drunk man, and yes, maybe I wobbled from side to side BUT at least I could walk slowly in the house, which is more than they thought I would do.

Today starts the daily care, could be months..... but Dr. is pretty confident that as long as we're following all the protocol, it should heal over. And I am very patient, trusting, always listen, and let them do anything to me without any fight, so it shouldn't be any problem. I ate, took my medicine, and am walking today. And doing pretty well!! Mom and Dad are so proud of me!

Now mom and dad said we need to pray even harder for the cancer to remain "at bay" for as long as possible!!! Taking it one day at a time! And living each moment to the fullest!

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Update #1

January 2nd, 2024

Wednesday 12/20  My friends and family, Please pray for our boy Payne today. (I think Craig and I need it too please). Today/Wednesday is his surgery to remove a sarcoma/tumor on his hind leg/foot (3 opinions later) This was a very Hard decision, but we believe right now, even though we don't have any type of heath ins. on him, we need to do everything we can to give him a chance. Don't know what that exactly means with cancer and all, but I'd always feel so terrible if I didn't at least try.

Praying for some more pain-free happy car rides, helping dad outside, playing with the grandkids, watching birds out the window, don't know abut chasing those groundhogs and squirrels....that might be stretching it, but at least some more snuggle time and love from my momma Dana!

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