Gabriel's Goodbye

Raised:

 USD $700

Campaign created by Kaitlyn Durand Boyer

Gabriel's Goodbye

I think the most appropriate starting point for our family's story & more importantly Gabriel & his Mother's story is this past Christmas Eve. That was when his mother was transported & admitted to Advent Health for long term care for the remainder of her pregnancy. This was after roughly 4 months of ordered bed rest from suffering a hematoma one evening while at her work. The results of that event saw Mom not be able to retain healthy levels of amniotic fluid within her womb for the critical development of Gabriel's heart & lungs. Of course, this was a detail that would only be truly realized after he was born. Going forward from that time, Mom would routinely receive IV treatments to help keep her fluid levels elevated however, over a varying amount of time, each & every time, the level would end up diminishing to the point of requiring another round of fluids. During this time we were also relegated to having to apply for & receive public assistance due to Mom having to go on doctor ordered medical leave from her job & myself being out of previous part time work due to existing medical conditions & our decision to home school our daughter. Due to the circumstances & also the requirements of receiving assistance, my efforts to secure work were renewed & extremely amplified, but due to the job market at the time coupled with the fact that I was legally obligated to answer yes to having pre-existing medical conditions that could hinder my ability to execute normal job responsibilities, I never received any call backs. Meanwhile, Mom's recurring fluid issues finally resulted in the need for long term care & saw her be admitted to a hospital 100+ miles away while our daughter & myself were left to experience our first holiday season without her.

On January 29th 2025, our lives were blessed & forever changed with the unexpected early arrival of our new baby boy. Like his sister before him, we chose not know prior to birth whether we were going to be blessed with a boy or another girl. To us, there's just something about not knowing what GOD is going to bless you with until his blessing is actually delivered to you. Gabriel had his name chosen during his big sister's pregnancy, however we chose his middle name of Vincent Isaiah Patrick to honor the saints of the same names, and so that his name would forever reflect that he was our little VIP. Gabriel was born at 28 weeks and 2 days. Due to the low amniotic fluid conditions suffered throughout his pregnancy, both his lungs but especially his right lung was underdeveloped & he was immediately placed in a ventilator after his birth. While his left lung was developed enough to perform adequately enough to support his respiration, the upper & middle lobes of his right lung became riddled with pnumataceals. This condition would end up necessitating surgery, however, being born at just 2lbs and 4oz meant that he would need to not just survive but thrive enough to meet a weight of at least 5lbs before a surgery team would agree to help him. Despite these odds, Gabriel survived and was able to thrive enough eventually for his needed surgery, but the road from his birth to his surgery was frought with one health scare after another. The weekend of my birthday in March began with Gabriel's O2 stats and vitals running dangerously low due to air accumulating in his chest that was leaking from his right lung. His only hope & our only option was to allow his doctors to insert three drainage tubes in the right side of his chest to help excavate the excess air build up and hopefully keep any excess air from building up again while we waited for him to respond with any positive increase in his vitals. It took almost 4 full days for his vitals to return to a "positive" state again, and finally he was able to resume his critically "stable" status, however an echo cardiogram revealed that the low functionality of his right lung has resulted in hypertension and a moderate loss of heart function in the right side of his heart. The need for his surgery become even more critical than it was previously was now. Despite this & the odds stacked against him from the moment he was born, a long with a continuing myriad of setbacks, complications, & recurring episodes of destatted vitals; Gabriel endured. More than endure however, Gabriel refused to stay down; no matter the odds and medical outlooks stacked against him. His absolute refusal to not fight and endure prompted us to affectionately start calling him our little Rocky. For in true Rocky spirit, Gabriel went round after round, and took punch after punch, but kept punching back and always got back up. He fought for his life every day he was blessed to live it and in doing so ended up teaching his family around him what it truly meant to fight against all odds and hold on to each other through anything & everything. Mom, myself & his big sister repeatedly encouraged him to keep punching & never stay down because we're a family and that is what families do for each other, they fight for & never give up on each other. 

During this time we were fortunate enough to be blessed to be able to stay at a Ronald McDonald House adjacent to the hospital. This allowed us, Mom, Dad, and big Sissy; to be able to spend every day with our baby boy. Talking to him, reading to him, singing to him, helping in his cares & diaper changes, feeling our lungs seize, our hearts freeze, & then sink below our stomachs while we collectively prayed together as a family whenever Gabriel would have an episode where his stats would decline & it would take what seemed like forever before they would start to trend upward again. For Mom and myself, this also meant being able to alternate nights sleeping bedside next to him in his room while the other one of us stayed in our room at the McDonald house with his big Sissy. The only drawback to this scenario was that it is a policy of the RMH 's we stayed at to allow a maximum 30 day stay before being required to check out for a minimum of 48 hours and subsequently, being put back at the bottom of their waitlist even though we and every other family with a critical condition loved one that stayed there had already previously waited our turn on that list to be gifted a room. Sadly, they harbor no policy exceptions for families who have children who are critical & receiving ongoing care. So during the times when our 30 day stays would end, Mom would stay beside with Gabriel at the hospital while big sister & I would make the trek home so that I could start playing catch-up on our home that was essentially being abandoned for 30 days at a time.

Finally, the 2nd week of April arrived & brought with it the OK from the surgery team that Gabriel had reached a point of weight and health stability that was assuring enough to them that he could not only endure the surgery but successfully pull through it. Gabriel's surgery occurred the morning of April 18th and resulted in the upper & middle lobes of his right lung having to be removed. Fortunately, the surgeon saw that as soon as they were, his remaining lower lobe immediately responded & started functioning normally, or as normally as a stiff underdeveloped lung could. Again, due to the low fluid levels suffered during his pregnancy, Gabriel's remaining lung lobe, while viable, was rigid & nowhere near elastic enough to function without the need for a ventilator. Roughly 12 hours after his surgery concluded, Gabriel's vitals started to decline. While we had come to the hospital with my other family members for the day of his surgery, we were between 30 day stays at the RMH & had to return home later that afternoon. Mom of course had remained & frantically called us around 11 that evening stating Gabriel's doctors had advised that we should return there ASAP. To try & counter his deteriorating state, Gabriel's doctors increased his current meds as well as adding in new ones. The sudden increase in fluid levels resulted in Gabriel's body retaining so much fluid that his body was unable to to expel it as fast as he was receiving it. For the next almost 2 weeks we watched as our son's body had swollen to the point of his skin literally cracking & leaking excess fluid. Gabriel literally became unrecognizable at times & the fluid excess was so much that his ventilator pressure had to be increased to help fight off fluid that had begun to flood his lungs. This unfortunately also ran a risk of causing him to suffer a stroke or strokes. As I implored GOD in my prayers at that time, Lord, now is the time when we really need you to show up, for it not now, when? As every time before however Gabriel endured & slowly but surely through diarectics & physical therapy, Gabriel's fluid levels receeded & his beautiful face became recognizable again.


After another 30 day stay concluded & alittle over a month removed from his surgery, big sister & I were again having to say goodbye to Gabriel & Mom while we waited to receive another call for a new room. This would unfortunately be the last time his sister & I would ever get to look into his ever curious & full of life eyes. 5 days shy of becoming 5 months old & after endless fighting with only fleeting moments of peace in between, the life in Gabriel's heart could no longer continue to match his spirit's desire & drive to never give up; & shortly after the sun broke the horizon on Memorial Day weekend, while I sat helpless but frantically praying on a phone call with his mother, Gabriel's heart succumbed to the enormous stress & wear it had endured since his birth. He passed peacefully in his sleep while his doctors tried for almost 30 mins straight to revive him but he had already returned to GOD, his newest Angel. We're humbly asking for any financial help to arrange a proper funeral & burial for our son. For during the last almost year now, we depleted the little bit of savings our family previously had to be present for our baby boy. TY & GOD BLESS.

Recent Donations
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Claire Jamieson
$ 200.00 USD
1 month ago

All the love and peace for sweet Gabriel. 💜

Anonymous Giver
$ 50.00 USD
1 month ago

I’m so sorry for your loss and everything you all have gone through!

Anonymous Giver
$ 50.00 USD
1 month ago

We are so sorry for your loss.

Sarah
$ 50.00 USD
1 month ago

I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. All my love to your family in your time of need.

Cheryl DurandhillAA
$ 300.00 USD
1 month ago

Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Love Grammy, Auntie Pam & Auntie Ka

Mom and Dad
$ 50.00 USD
1 month ago

We love you so much and are so proud of the immense amount of strength and courage you all have shown this past year.

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