My name is Melyssa, and the very handsome and interesting man pictured above is my husband, Matthew. Matthew and I met in April 1995 at Crystal Palace, located inside Disney’s Magic Kingdom in Lake Buena Vista, Florida. The first thing this insane human ever said to me was “did you know we are gonna get married” I thought he was crazy, but 15 months later this would become a reality. We were so young, I was only 19, Matthew was 23, we had a newborn, and we were terrified, but we had an amazing support system around us. My family adored Matthew from the very first moment they met him, especially after he moved in with my family the year before to help take care of us after my Dad had emergency open heart surgery, and could no longer take care of his disabled wife and daughter, and could not take care of himself. Matthew was our savior. I had brothers, they did not show up, but Matthew did. Matthew slept on the couch, he cooked, he cleaned, he mowed the yard, all while still working full-time himself, but he never complained. It was an extremely difficult time, but we made it through because of Matthew, he has never shrugged away from hard work. Our son, Tommy, has always been the absolute joy of our lives, and while we have never had much extra financially, our home has never lacked for love. Life has not always been easy on us, we have lost far too many people close to us, many of them much too young, but during the most difficult of times, we simply grabbed onto each other and refused to let go.

    On September 10, my husband, Matthew, was admitted into the hospital after imaging showed a 2cm mass on his bladder and a 4cm mass of his left kidney. The doctors had found not one, but two separate masses, so on September 11th, a surgeon went in to remove the mass she found in Matthew’s bladder, it was confirmed to be cancer. Further tests were performed the next day (thanks to an oncologist not willing to take my husband’s family medical history lightly) and within a few days we finally had more answers. The surgeon was hopeful she had removed the present tumors in my husband’s bladder, but unfortunately the cancer was aggressive and had already reached “high grade” status (high rate of reoccurrence), but it had not spread into the muscle wall meaning it was still stage one! An MRI confirmed the mass on Matthew’s left kidney as “suspected” renal cell carcinoma, but again, thanks to the extensive testing this oncologist was willing to perform, we were able to leave the hospital on September 13th knowing Matthew’s cancer had not spread into his lymph nodes, and it had not metastasized. While this was all great news because it was found so early, to say our world blew up would be putting it mildly. For almost 30 years now, Matthew has been taking care of me, I was born with a neurological disorder, as was our son, but now Matthew was the patient…we were not prepared.

    Matthew is a commercial electrician (who loves to brag about building spaceships and roller coasters for the theme parks in Orlando) so the heat and physical level of work he does makes the possibility of working throughout all of his treatments impossible. Having lost both my parents and all my grandparents (most of our entire support system) I had no choice but to ask complete strangers for help, and while at first we were shocked, people stepped up! Neighbors started cooking for us, many churches added us to their prayer lists, strangers prayed for us and with us, people donated Door Dash and Uber Eats gift cards to help with meals while we were traveling for medical treatments or just needed to cover dinner in between shifts by helpful neighbors, the outpouring of love we received was incredible. Honestly, we would not have known what to do without all the support. The help we received got us through those first several weeks, which were almost impossible with me, a disabled person, trying to take care of a grown man with extremely limited capabilities, who wanted to be anything other than the patient!

    Matthew being accepted as a patient at Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa, Florida was extremely lucky, and we were fortunate to be seen on October 7, 2024, just 2 days before Hurricane Milton slammed into the Gulf Coast of Florida. Fortunately, Moffitt Cancer Center did not sustain devastating damage, but many places locally did, which pushed Matthew’s scheduled surgery for his left kidney on November 21st to December 19th. Matthew was fortunate to begin his bladder treatments of BCG on October 25th and complete the first course of treatment on Thanksgiving, not where he wanted to spend the holiday, but it gave our family something to be grateful for. Unfortunately for Matthew, the bladder treatments will continue for THREE years. Yes, you did read that correctly, three years. This means a LOT of procedures, a lot of tests, a lot of traveling, and a lot of missed time from work, none of which we can afford. Like most Americans in 2024, we not only have debt, we also do not have savings. We have medical benefits, really good medical benefits, which is unusual for the construction industry, but it doesn’t cover everything. I lost a very dear friend to cancer on August 27 because he had to put off treatment and his cancer spread, he was only 47, Matthew is 51. While my friend’s death was tragic, it probably saved my husband’s life because we did NOT wait to seek treatment. We have short-term disability through my husband’s employer, but it is only 60% of his salary. Due to my disability, I no longer drive so getting around will be challenging post-surgery, and there will be things I have to pay people to help with while Matthew is recuperating. Tommy is doing his best to help, but he works full-time and lives with the same disability I do. It is challenging.

    Matthew is my soulmate. He IS my heart. He is the heart of our family, and we need him to get better. Matthew has the perfect attitude to survive this, he brings warmth with him everywhere he goes, including dressing up for his BCG treatments in different attire ranging from Mickey Mouse pajamas, to Grogu pajamas, to finally Grinch pajamas. Needless to say, the nurses love him! It would be easy for Matthew to be angry or bitter, especially having lost his own Mom to stage 4 lung cancer in July 2023 but instead, he smiles. Matthew continues to pray for others, hold open doors, help elderly shoppers with their groceries, etc. because it is just who he is. At this time of year, it is the real reason for this season, and he is such a shining example of who more people should aspire to be.

    We still have a very long road ahead of us, but right now we are trying to focus on Matthew’s surgery this Thursday, December 19th, his mom’s birthday…tell me that is not Divine Intervention! Our family would appreciate ANY and ALL help, whether it be financial (every little bit helps with me on permanent disability), physical help doing things Matthew would normally be doing himself such as lawn care or taking the dumpsters to the road, or even saying prayers for us to help get us through this difficult time. We welcome ALL help, and we will continue to keep those struggling around us in our thoughts and prayers. 2024 has been a difficult, if not impossible, year for many… I pray 2025 brings us all endless blessings and love. God bless you all.